After the challenge from the last blog to talk about our faith with others, I have had several requests to offer some practical guidance about talking to people about Jesus. So I'm going to take a few blogs to do just that. I hope it helps, and please, keep the feedback coming.
Attitude is the first practical concern. What we say and how we say it is shaped by our attitudes. I'll start with the two most common: political correctness and the belief that you actually save people.
Political correctness is a polite way to say peer pressure. It is an attempt by others to tell you what you should be embarrassed to talk about. In all honesty, many churches have done this for centuries and now the world has caught up. Ideas are not dangerous to talk about responsibly, but the censorship of ideas are. Political correctness is the last refuge for the lazy, the thoughtless, and the tyrant.
Relationships also suffer in a culture of political correctness. Instead of honesty, people are always frightened they will accidentally insult someone, be misunderstood, or be labeled for something they have said. It's like wearing a spacesuit. It may be safe, but it gets in the way of any real contact.
Political correctness is great for mindless sheep, but it's a debilitating trait for leaders, influencers, and friends. Honesty is a virtue. Fear is not.
I'm not recommending tactlessness. Being polite and sensitive are virtues as well. They can both be used in service of truth and love. Political correctness just means that you are letting other people control what you believe and say. If you bow to the power of political correctness, then you will find yourself in conflict with Jesus. Our culture tells us we should be embarrassed to talk openly about our religious beliefs, but Jesus says, "If any of you are ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of you when he comes in his Father's glory with the holy angels." (Mark 8:38)
The opposite attitude is also a hinderance to sharing. If we think it is our place to force others to believe, then we will most likely do more damage than good. I cannot change anyone's heart. Only God can do that. My job is to tell Jesus' story, to tell my story, give answers when they are requested, love, and serve.
If I believe it's all up to me, then each time Jesus comes up in a conversation, it becomes an all or nothing proposition. There are times when you will sit down and spread out the whole story of redemption before someone, but more often than not, it starts with bits and pieces. You make a comment here or there or someone asks a couple of questions about your faith but doesn't go any further. That's fine. People process information a piece at a time. Curiosity develops over time. You are letting them know you are comfortable about talking about your faith and that you won't leap on them every time they ask a question.
If you think you save people, then you will push too hard. You will try to dominate others. You will back people into a corner. You are responsible for your decisions and not for other people's decisions. Don't try to live other people's lives for them. That's not love. That's not friendship.
So if you choose to give other people the space to make their own decisions while rejecting the political correct idea that spiritual indifference is somehow loving, you will find you will become a better communicator and a better friend. You will find gentle honesty to be freeing. The first, practical step in sharing effectively is to examine your attitudes and let Jesus deliver you from the fears that can rob others of the opportunity of new life.
Next time, I will look at practical ways to bring Jesus into your conversations.
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